Depending on the person, people can approach this topic in many different ways. I’m sure every “gaming parent” journey is mostly unique to them. You learn to balance time between your child or children all the while trying to enjoy some of your favorite games. You want to make your child happy and enjoy your favorite hobby. So today we will talk a little about my journey and learning to game as a parent.
Early Years
I’ll admit I put myself in a hard place early on in my daughter’s life. It hadn’t even been a year since I graduated high school before I was thrusted into parenthood. All I wanted to do was hang out with my friends and play the next big game to release. I had to grow up a lot quicker than I planned and I was never perfect. I’ll admit I definitely wasn’t mature enough, but I learned, and I grew as a person and parent. There were many times my daughter would need attention and she would join good old dad in his recliner and watch as I played Phantasy Star Universe on Xbox 360. Sometimes she just wanted to be near, but I think she enjoyed all the crazy animations and visuals that the game had.
I actually found myself playing more games that she seemed to enjoy watching. Some of those games included Phantasy Star Universe, Guitar Hero, and Hydro Thunder just to name a couple. Then when she would sleep, I’d be hopping right back to Halo, Mass Effect, and Oblivion. There were times in between rounds of whatever multiplayer game I would play; I would ready up a bottle for her. Or meet whatever needs she had at that time. I did have some great help early on as well, so I didn’t go through these early years solo. I can honestly say my daughter was a super happy happy baby more than not. So even though there were a few times I struggled, her being a happy baby helped a lot while I was learning to game as a young parent.
Shared Enjoyment in Gaming
As my daughter grew older, she developed an interest in gaming. This was great for me as it allowed me to be a good parent while enjoying my gaming hobby. During these years while I learned to game as a parent, my daughter learned what Pokemon and Mario were. Many hours of her just watching me play and asking to play Mario on 3DS or asking when she could have her first Pokemon. I might have told a little white lie that on her tenth birthday, she could get her first Pokemon and travel the world as a trainer. Needless to say, she wasn’t very happy on her tenth birthday when that didn’t happen. Even though we began to share our gaming interests, I still made sure she took care of her grades and got plenty of outside activity.
I’d like to say these years leading to the teenage years were kind of the glory years on the journey. She would love nothing more than to sit on my lap for hours and play. When I would play whatever game on console she would be engulfed in Mario and Pokemon. Then when she saw Mario Kart and Mario Party on the Nintendo Switch it was time for competition. I was able to enjoy playing some great games that we both really enjoyed. I will say I also never let her win so when she did it finally meant something.
The Gaming Culture
As I continued to adapt and still was learning to game as a parent something started to change. The something was what she was interested in playing. Instead of us playing Pokemon, Mario Kart, and Mario Party she was playing Fortnite and Roblox. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing as she is happy and occupied, but it brings about the online gaming world. We all know how toxic the gaming space can be. Whether you are in-game chat or on social media the gaming world and be a toxic place. Luckily in my knowledge to this day, she hasn’t experienced that kind of hate we know that I’m talking about. I find myself worrying about different things she might experience.
One thing I am confident in saying is I believe as she and I both have kind of grown together, I believe she is a good person. We all know how crazy those multiplayer lobbies were. As she has grown and shown more maturity than I have at that age, I don’t think I have to worry about her much. Even though as a parent we will always continue to worry about our kids, especially in this gaming space. Even to this day, I am still learning to game as a parent, and my daughter is 16.
Present Day
Learning to game as a parent these days is a lot easier. My daughter only has a couple of years of high school left. So, my biggest concern these days is making sure she graduates while allowing her to come into her own. I can pretty much game whenever I’m not working these days, but I lean more towards trying to find time with her. I work 12.25 hours, plus I’m a union representative, and co-community manager/senior writer for the site. So, as you can gather, I am a very busy person. I also recently moved in with a significant other and now our families are beginning to blend. Not only do I try to spend time with my daughter, but her kids now as well.
Luckily to a point, we all enjoy some type of game. As you might think Roblox and Fortnite are at the top of the interest list. These days when the kids (all mid to late teenagers) are awake I try to include them in some “family gaming” so to speak. Games like Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader and Who Wants to be a Millionaire are a couple we have played together. I will say that there are times wether my daughter or one of her daughters will watch while I play some other games. There have been a few times playing Octopath Traveler 2 one of the kids has fallen asleep on the couch. My personal gaming time since I mostly work nights is usually late at night so this can be a common occurrence.
Proud Gaming Parent Moments
As I have learned to game as a parent there have been a few moments that stick out to me. I did enjoy playing Phantasy Star Univers on Xbox 360 with my daughter at my side while she was “baby babbling” as the visuals were happening. A lot of time was spent in the casino on that game. Then for my daughter, two moments made me really proud. The first time she beat me in a Pokemon battle with her Pokemon X team was a great moment for her. I never let her win ever and she had been getting better and better. We were at a point when I couldn’t take it easier on her anymore and then that moment, she beat me finally made her whole world.
The second time was when she beat me for the first time on Mario Kart. Just like the other times, I never let her beat me. Every time she played though she got better and better till I couldn’t mess around anymore. Then it all culminated when her playing as Princess Peach beat me in the last second. To see her enjoyment as a gaming parent I was elated. Because I remembered gaming with my uncle all the time. Each time I would win I was ecstatic.
Closing Thoughts
Overall, there is no perfect way to learn to game as a parent. Every single situation can be different for a different person. I can say I never forced my daughter’s interest in gaming, and it was something she chose herself. Would I enjoy more gaming together like when she was younger? Absolutely. But I am happy she continues to find her own way in the gaming world. It has led us to enjoy other hobbies together like certain movies, shows, and even some anime. So, the biggest piece of advice is to do what comes naturally to you as a parent. That is the biggest piece of advice I’d give younger Chris as he was learning to game as a parent.
