Time flies, huh?
I want to preface this by saying that I do not talk about myself at all (even on social media). I am someone who hates taking credit or the spotlight. Not because I can’t handle it, but because I love to work, and that’s it. Ironically, juxtaposed to that mentality is this article that actually will talk about me and who I am. Sure, I have made many opinion pieces (no matter how they look) and game reviews over the years. But those are critical takes, not actual self-reflection or exposition. That being said, I am not very interesting to listen to, sorry to burst your bubble!
Starting as an Anxious Nothing
When I applied to Lords of Gaming, I had only been writing for a handful of months. I actually started at a website that doesn’t exist anymore, which was once run by someone I call a friend, and it also gave me another really good friend in my life to this day. I had started writing after finishing Nier: Automata, and the inspiration it gave the younger me (I’m turning 31 this year, by the way) made me realize I wasn’t appreciating the life I had, and I just went for it. When I learned that the website would be shutting down, I had initially taken it as “well, I had a good run,” but immediately realized that, well, I had a portfolio!
I realized I had actual proof that I could write (despite that content being gone now, but also pretty unrefined to my memory), and I was actually excited to send the email. After I was accepted and brought in, that excitement changed to anxiety. It was no longer just a small crew with the website owner, but an actual tiered organization with people who were and still are leagues above me in their work. Looking at what they were capable of, I realized quickly: I didn’t know what I was doing!
Some of my very first articles at Lords of Gaming were news-centric, with some game reviews thrown out to test the waters. I had a lot, and I do mean a lot to learn. They’re hard to read now, as I kind of “cringe” when I know I could do it all over again, but much better now. But only doing these made me fall into a cycle of sorts, little news things here and there, to reviews of games, most of which I was honored to do for the developers, including Chorus and Ultra Age. During that first year, through watching, waiting, and learning from the Editors who made my writing what it is today (thanks, Josh, Nick, and Mahmood!) I had realized something by the end of that first year: I was just “another writer,” nothing special.
Going into 2022, and becoming an Editor myself (which was an honor to step into that role), I made a vow to look into a publisher and see if it was worth it to cover their game at all. And oh boy, was it!
From “Another Writer” to Lifeblood in 5 Years
Starting in 2022, I started to cover Warframe, the marquee title for Digital Extremes. The coverage was light at the time, some news, and again, a review or two of some of the content. It was cyclical at first, but I wanted to hone in on the game after a partnership was established with them after months of just building onto the coverage. It made me a “one-trick pony”, sure. But it was safe, reliable, and admittedly exciting at times. Now that I am entering year 4 of that extensive coverage, it has turned into something I never actually expected it to.
You see, as I kept making article after article for Warframe, then Soulframe, this content formed a “snowball” of sorts. This snowball grew bigger and bigger over the years (even up to today), amounting to a massive chunk of Lords of Gaming’s daily traffic. I wasn’t just writing for a company I love. I was contributing silently to the well-being of the only site I could turn to when my old one was going away. This is not to discredit the invaluable work of my peers and fellow editors; they inspire me to keep going for them to pursue their endeavors worry-free.
While I don’t view myself as a big deal, the work I do every day is a big deal for the site I love so much. I took it upon myself to amass so much content that contributes in the way that it does, and I wouldn’t change a thing about it. But during this whole time, I was still able to flex my capabilities in more places than my bedroom at my PC.
Anxious Outings Alone and Amongst Friends
In 2024, 3 years into my journey, I finally got to meet my people at PAX East. My bosses, my friends, and colleagues, I got to share multiple days with (even in the ice-cold rain).
It was stressful and brought back a level of anxiety I wasn’t sure I still had. I was becoming sleep-deprived before the trip, and didn’t catch a whole lot of Z’s during. I was effectively a zombie that was trying to be an excited convention goer alongside the people I admire and still work with day-to-day. It sucked, but later in the year, I got to make up for it, despite being more anxiety-stricken.
Lords of Gaming has been privileged to go to TennoCon and provide on-site coverage courtesy of Digital Extremes twice in 2024 and last year.
While I was the only one who got to go, I made sure to never squander the opportunity. During the trip in 2024, I faced it all alone, pacing in my hotel room trying to figure out how to handle everything, but on the day of the big show… I just did it, and it worked out better than I expected somehow. A special interview with the legendary Kevin Lim started the day (with surprise guests at the end of the interview), and highlights of every big news item followed that evening.
It was my first time doing stuff like this, and I was so proud of myself. So much so that I pushed myself further the following year, doubling the overall coverage of that second TennoCon in 2025. It’s always “work work work” for me, and knowing the honor I was given to be there, I couldn’t let it go to waste.
Even with that focus, I got to meet so many people and voice actors, whether it was the leading lady of Warframe, Rebecca Ford, the Creative Director of Soulframe, Geoff Crookes, or even the President of Digital Extremes, Sheldon Carter, alongside many of their voice cast. Such as sharing a breakfast with Ben Starr once, with many other people around, and meeting Alpha Takahashi, Elsie Lovelock, James Conlin, and many more.
My heart was full after all this and still is. I’m not sure if I even deserved to have photos with people like this, but Lords of Gaming, after all these years, opened that door, and I braved it to have memories I carry around day-to-day.
But is this it after 5 Years?
It’s such a strange question to ask myself after all these years. I felt like I was losing my love for writing at one point. I had actually pushed myself to enlist at other websites for short periods of time to create work I was very proud of. Whether it was explosive opinion pieces, sharing news, investigative journalism, or trying to create another snowball I could be proud of (and failing at that last part!) I kept pushing myself more and more to keep my hunger sated. Writing is all I know, and the biggest fear is going back to certain heightened levels of expectations and knowing I have a high chance of failing again.
The reason I still write is just that it’s second nature to me. What was I doing when I was 26? Well, working, like I’m sure you’re doing right now, dear reader. I still do, don’t worry, I’m nothing special, still. Looking back now, I was just someone inspired to wake up, get up, and get out there. I did, god damn, I did. Five years before that, my dad had to be laid to rest, and the last thing he asked of me was to enjoy my life. I definitely have these last 5 years, and I hope I can for another 5 years or longer, for him. But what does that look like, I wonder?
To everyone who has read this, thank you. To everyone who has ever read a single one of my now thousand articles (this one being the milestone), thank you; it means the world to me. I started from nothing and found myself in places I could never have imagined. I earned so many memories and have a lot to be proud of. My only hope is that one day this never gets taken from me. I wasn’t done in 2021, and I’m only getting started now, I think.
If you were ever scared to try, don’t be. My success feels like a total accident, trust me. But I’m glad I got to experience it all. Pick up the pen, start a blog, or make a YouTube channel. It’s never too late, and if you don’t start, you’ll never have that chance to make memories as I did.
Thank you for reading.
